Happy Birthday Evalyn Coleman!

Many of you who read my blog know my mom well.

Those of you who don't should get to know her.

Today is her birthday, and therefore an additional reason to celebrate her and her countless positive attributes.

As a teenager, I spent far too much energy pushing my mom away, and not even nearly enough focusing in on her and learning as much as I could about being an incredibly strong and capable woman. Since then, I find myself taking on many of the characteristics I spot in her, calling her frequently to seek advice, a recipe, or just a supportive voice on the other end, and probably most often, looking to her for approval in nearly every single one of my daily tasks. 

Our conversations usually start with...

"Mom...what was that one recipe...(you know that one that I refused to make with you several times while living at home)...I'd really like to have that."

"Mom...I have no idea what to do..." often, by the time I've expressed this she has already thrown out the most perfect answer before I can even ask the question. How do those mother's do it?

OR

"So today I cleaned this...and took this exam...and cooked this..." and before I can even pause long enough to realize that all I'm doing is seeking praise, she has bombarded me with how proud she is, how much she loves me, and how excited she is for me. 

So, to my best friend and mom, I'd like to make a tribute, and further explain the many things she has taught me. 

From a very young age, my mom engrained within me a love for music. I think my sisters would agree that there is no feeling quite as comforting as that which we feel when she sits at our piano at home and sings. She would gather us around as little girls and even now, teaching us harmonies, and motioning towards us anytime a page needed to be turned or part needed to be sung. There was hardly a silent moment in our house or cars. Whether it was saturday chores, or a trip to the store, music was blasting---a fact that I think is to blame for my inability to hear anything under the highest volume. 

As music was a big part of my mom's childhood, it was a means for her to develop family unity within our home. Family is my mom's lifeline. Whether it is a phone call to her siblings, bonnie, or a date with my dad, she prioritizes family at the top of her list. I remember countless "I love you's" shared during my childhood, expressed with tears in her eyes and the tightest squeeze possible. I never doubted for a second that my mom felt something real -- one could even describe it as divine. When my mom conveyed her love to me in this way, I couldn't help but feel it resonate within me. My mom has been a mother to many, in offering advice, a place to stay, and that deep love. She is fiercely loyal to family, and has passed that on to each of us girls. Even when the three of us did not get along, there was an unspoken understanding that, we would have each other's backs in kicking a bully's butt if he picked on one of the Coleman girls. Now as I begin my own family, I have a clear understanding of what is most important.

  My mom always taught us the importance of being confident in the way we look. She taught us that confidence is the most sexy attribute. She taught us that hair always grows back and that it is one of the best ways to express oneself (a way to deter us from piercings and tattoos, I suspect.) I can thank my mom for many of my best & worst hair phases. My mom is the best personal shopper I have ever seen--tv shows included, What Not to Wear has to idea what kind of competition they've got! She taught us how to apply make up in a natural way, how to shave our legs, how to dress in a way that was modest but still fashionable. These all may seem like superficial things unless you have ever been a teenage girl. My mom saved us from the confusion of being a preteen--by teaching us these things she helped us pass through a period of gangly awkwardness still feeling happy to be ourselves. She always encouraged my confidence in telling me how beautiful I was, every chance she got. She could sense when we were feeling down on ourselves and would quickly remedy it with words of encouragement or some well needed shopping therapy. 

From my mom, I have adopted a deep rooted excitement and enthusiasm for the holidays. Every holiday was celebrated in a brilliant manner. Thanksgiving entailed a morning football game, early appetizers, a massive meal, and hours of every single person expressing their gratitude. That evening set off our Christmas experience, with the family gathering around the piano to sing carols. Soon after, it was time to get a tree, and spend the evening decorating it, while being spoiled with cocoa and christmas songs in the background. We'd often do an act of service for a family in need leading up to Christmas, and then Christmas eve my mom would invite anyone she could think of to act out the nativity scene and eat loads  of christmas treats. Once all of the guests headed home, we would read our family christmas story, open a present [always our brand new pajamas] and go to bed. It was always made clear that these holidays had more important aspects than food and presents. My mom would always passionately convey the true meaning of Christmas, something my sister's and I now feel equally passionate about. As I reflect on these holidays, I feel overwhelmed with gratitude for the efforts that my mom put towards us having christmas', thanksgivings,  valentines days and easters to remember. I know that these memories are something I will hold dear throughout my entire life, and an ideal that I will try to emulate each year with my own family. 

Probably one of the most important things my mom has ever taught me, or my sisters, is to educate ourselves. My mom is an avid reader. As I think back to many of our family vacations over the years, I have an image my my mom cuddled up with a book, completely engrossed in its contents. This is something we would tease her for, begging her to just put it down and play for a bit. It was not until later that I understood reading is just as fun as playing. Any time that I could not sleep, or I was feeling ill, or having a difficult break up of some sorts, my mom would come to by bedside with four or five books. She would read the first couple pages of each of them until one sparked my interest, and then she would encourage me to dive in. After the completion of a book, she would strike up a conversation about it, further conveying the fun of reading. Books have since been a frequent topic of conversation, and a medium through which my mom and I have bonded. She is one of the most well educated women I know, and I as well as she attribute so much of that to reading. She reads a heavy non-fiction and after completing it, allows herself to read a fun and relaxing fiction. There is hardly a topic I could ask my mom about and not receive an answer that originated from one of her books. For all four of us girls, books are treasures, mediums through which to escape and learn, and full of memories held near and dear. 

From singing to reading, there are so many things my mom has taught me that I am grateful for. The most important things however, is that my mom has been there to guide me, support me, and encourage me in all of my most important decisions. She was my cheerleader when I was accepted to BYU, helping me to see that this university would be the best thing for me, she was my rock during the more difficult times, and my go to person while I made the giant leap of getting married. She was always in tune to my needs, and to what would be best for me, and for that I am forever indebted to her. She continues to guide me along, in making my future the brightest it can be. I am sure that if I can continue to take on her characteristics, values, and passion for life, I will live the best life possible for myself. 

Happy Birthday to you Mom. You are the cherished by so many.

To those of you who do know my mom...Please comment [on the blog please, not on Facebook, so that it can all be in one place] with a memory, or a short sentence expressing your love for her. 

Until next time,

I